25 weeks along, and bedrest isn't fun

I am 6 months pregnant, and man, has it been a ride. First I started out the 1st trimester with horrible morning sickness, which caused me to lose 15 pounds and be on Zofran to prevent me from throwing up (which I STILL have to take to this day). It was also fraught with many migraines which was also not fun.

The second trimester started out better, with finding out that we are having a little boy who will be named Carson, and feeling him kick and move. I was finally able to feel connected to the little guy. Scott also has been able to feel him several times, which has brought tears of joy and excitement. Also, plans for the baby room and registering for baby showers with Scott have been wonderful distractions. I have also tapped into my creative, domesticated self (which is not a strong point in my life) and started crocheting and sewing and all things crafty. I am currently working on 2 baby blankets to keep my mind off of the recent events of the last month. So here's what's been going on.

I have what's called Hydronephrosis, which basically means water in the kidney. My uterus is sitting on my ureters, and therefore backing up my urine in my kidney, making it swell very large. It is extremely painful. I saw my kidney on the ultrasound, and its huge. My Obgyn is referring me to a Urologist and I see him on Monday. But until then, I have to lay on my left side as much as I can for as long as I can to try and move my uterus out of the way so my kidney can drain. If I am successful, and the swelling has gone down, I will probably be on mostly bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy to keep my kidney from swelling up again, which is damaging to my kidney. If bedrest shows no improvement, then I will most likely have surgery to drain it out. I will find out on Monday what's happening exactly. All I know is that both outcomes don't sound good, and I am sick of having to take lortab to function. But I am very grateful that all of this is not affecting the baby, just me. I am very grateful for that. I prayed over and over as I waited in the doctors office that the baby wasn't being affected my whatever was going on with me, and my prayers were answered. If I have to endure lots of pain and bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy with the knowledge that my baby will be fine, I will do it with a smile on my face. The only thing I have asked for each night is a strong, healthy baby, and I pray that will happen. Being on all this medication worries me, despite the fact that my Doctor says it's fine. I guess my body just doesn't like being pregnant. I just hope I can get through the next 3 months and have a beautiful baby boy at the end of it. I only wish I could do more. I wish I could be one of those women who feel great during pregnancy, and get so much done, and can work full time for most of it without too much problems. I wish I could massage more, and take voice and piano lessons, and visit the temple each week. Those were all goals I had for myself at the beginning of this year, but now are not possible to accomplish. But I am trying to keep myself occupied, with my little projects. I hope I don't sound like I am complaining. This entry feels like I am venting in a journal, just spilling out my thoughts and worries and wishes. I hope everyone knows I want to be a mom, that I'm excited to be a mom, and can't wait. That is the ultimate goal here, and I WILL achieve it, no matter what.